The CBC school violence investigation in 2019 release that 41 per cent of boys say they were physically assaulted at high school; 26 per cent of girls say they experienced unwanted sexual contact at school; and one in four students first experienced sexual harassment or assault before Grade 7. (CBC News, https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/school-violence-editors-note-1.5331402 ) Depending on the data, boys are more likely to face peer-on-peer bullying, while girls seem to tend to suffer sexual violence. The school violence in Canada is rife and gender-based. 

First of all, I begin my discussion by focusing on notions behind boys’ peer-to-peer school violent behaviour. In case of Jayden(CBC News, https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/school-violence-marketplace-1.5224865 ), some boys, like with full preparation, took the video of their crime while other boys brutally attacked Jayden down. As a result, Jayden was seriously injured, brain bleed, a fractured skull, the broken bone in his ear and hearing loss. Obviously, the attackers show no empathy to their peers. On the contrary, they break the school rule of non violence to flaunt their aggressiveness and show their power and superiority among peers by bullying other students in school. This conforms to stereotypes of masculinity. Masculinity is characterized by a willingness to take (physical) risks and become violent if necessary. (Kilmartin, 2019)

Then come to discuss the gender norms behind sexual abuse.  “One in four girls surveyed said they had personally faced unwanted sexual contact”  and one girl complained: “A boy exposed his penis and ejaculated on the clothing of a group of girls who were chatting during lunch hour,” said another. (CBC News, https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/school-violence-marketplace-1.5224865 ) Apparently, the boys engaged in sexual violence treat girls unequally, and they even can’t realize it is criminal to touch girls’s body unceremoniously or sexually abuse girls. Impacted by stereotypes masculinity, as Kilmartin says in his book that boys’ interactions are often geared toward competition, they are barraged with messages that they should not act like girls, and they are encouraged to value girls and women only as sexual objects.( Kilmartin, 2019)

Facing with the crimes of the boys who are misled by problematic masculinity, Parents, education institutes, media and the whole society need to pay serious attention to it and take actions to keep schools safer. Parents are responsible to offer positive and healthy concept to their kids, such as equality between people, awareness of oneself and other people, etc.. In particular, the parents of boys should let them understand a real man is one who loves himself and the world, is someone who can be the best of himself and make the world better. Education institutes are responsible for reporting the school violence happening in the school to Ministry of Education, parents and students. Also education institutes should organize professional guidance counsellors to track and coach both victims and attackers in violent incidents. Media play an important role on switching problematic masculinity to healthy masculinity. Dr. Russo Johnson and Dr. Dafna Lemish reveal in their new research that amounted to nearly 600 shows on broadcasters in Canada are gender unequal. They suggest that gender balance and diversity, and a closer look at human characters should be in Kids’TV.( https://loversandfighterwinter202022photography.photo.blog/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/9778e-thelandscapeofchildren.pdf%27s+TV.pdf)

In conclusion, school violence is rising; it has been hurting thousands of students and will very likely traumatize them as long as a whole life. Problematic masculinity is one of the most important causes to school violence. Parents, education institutes and all the society as a whole should work together to help boys to establish healthy masculinity, to help kids to learn to become the best oneself, and finally to build a safer schools.

Reference:

1. Kilmartin, Christopher, and Andrew P. Smiler. “Defining Men’s Studies.” The Masculine Self, Cornwall On Hudson, NY, Sloan Publishing, 2019, p6.

2. Christopher Kilmartin and Andrew P. Smiler. “No Man Is an Island: Men in Relationships.” The Masculine Self,Cornwall On Hudson, NY, Sloan Publishing, 2019, pp.171.

International Women’s Week is a week of celebration, education, and awareness surrounding women’s and gender issues. During this week there was two Muslim women shared how Law 21 has created new realities for them that have affected their sense of belonging and ability to thrive in Quebec. Their presentations were very impressive, especially Nadia Naqvi’s speeches made me interested in Bill 21 and the Islamic veil.

Bill 21 is a controversial law as the arguments in the news Quebec women’s rights group defends Bill 21 in montreal.citynews.ca. On one hand, supporters say the Islamic veil is a symbol of sexism and doesn’t belong on public school. Marie Claude says the group’s stance is a defence of secularism, and democratic society is secular…they are defending the neutrality of institutions…it’s important for the province to be neutral and democratic. On the other hand, opponents say PDF hurts the women and the ban prevents a muslim woman from becoming a teacher or prosecutors.

It seems that it is obligatory for some muslim women to wear the Islamic veil. The majority of Muslim scholars and exegetes agreed that the believing women must cover their hair by putting on a Khimar and leave only their faces and hands uncovered in the presence of men who do not have a direct family relationship with them. (Asma-Lamrabet.com) Asma Lamrabet says the essence of Hijab aimed, mainly, to educate Arabs of that time to respect the privacy of people and good manners, but women were separated from men and society, in the name of Islam, by replacing the Khimar with Hijab means to confuse different and opposing semantic and conceptual fields in order to endorse, in the name of Islam, the exclusion of women from the sociopolitical space behind a curtain! Gender difference was produced in the same way as Kimmel stated in gender as an institution, the differences between women and men are reproduced, and in this way the inequality between women and men is legitimated.

The question of Hijab or the veil is currently one of the most controversial issues both in the Muslim country and the West, but beyond the question of the right to claim the “veil” and its religious legitimacy, it is helpful for women to aware more about women’s and gender issues through international women week.

I interviewed Jiang, a 45 years old man. He has a static work, a 17 year-old daughter and a beautiful wife. He also has many friends, and he consider one of them, let’s name him A, as his best friend. Jiang believes that A is go-getter, and A often gives him constructive feedback to his confusion about investment. Jiang prefers to stay with A, they always have comfortable conversations and feel relax with each other. Sometimes they go to tea-house together after work, sometimes they go fishing together. At one time, when they were enjoying their meal, Jiang told A that he considered A as his best friend and brother. At the same time, A told Jiang that he was glad to hear what Jiang said, and he considered Jiang as his brother too. They both hope to enjoy the life with the help of each other.

No man is an island: men in relationships. As a common man, Jiang has a family relationship with his daughter and wife, a working relationship with his supervisor and colleagues, and a friendship with his best friend and friends. Broadly speaking, Every man has a Series of relationships, because people are members of a variety of social system and are dependent on others for information, resources support and human contact, just as Chinese adage says that a good man has three gangs.

Masculinity and difference of gender did not occurred suddenly. As Micheal Kimmel writes “Institutions accomplish the creation of gender difference and the reproduction of gender order through several gendered processes.” First of all, the gendered identity of individuals shaped the institutions gendered. Next, the gendered institutions create gendered normative standards which are major factors for gender inequality. Then, Institutions themselves reproduces gender relations between women and men and the gender order of hierarchy and power. At last, differences between women and men, such as disadvantage and advantage, exploitation and control, etc. become “natural” outcomes.

The same way as sexual abuse talked about in the fourth episode of “Man Enough.”, masculinity is the root of why women are disregarded or sexually assaulted. Society accomplish the creation of inequality and exploitation of women. The collective socialization of manhood encourages men to win wealth and women. And sex is like about the male predator going after the female prey, dominating her, having his way with her and taking advantage of her.

Fortunately, more and more people realized the problem between men and women, and with many researches on masculinity being released, people get aware of masculinities, and are trying to change the gendered situations. As Kimmel writes, “Understanding how we do masculinities, then, requires that we make visible the performative elements of identity, and also the audience for those performances. It also opens up the unimaginable possibilities of social change.” Also, in the fourth episode of “Man Enough.” both women and men are responding to sexual assaults and inequality of women. I believe women will eventually become fully human and win fully worthy of respect. I believe women are flying alone as strong as men in the near future.

Ma Yun, also Jack Ma, is a Chinese business magnate and philanthropist. He is the co-founder and former executive chairman of Alibaba Group, a multinational technology conglomerate. As of January 2020, Ma is China’s richest man, with a net worth of $44.3 billion, as well as one of the wealthiest people in the world, ranked 20th by Bloomberg Billionaires Index and Forbes. He is considered as prominent business leader, and is frequently listed as one of the world’s most powerful people, with Forbes ranking him 21st on its “World’s Most Powerful People” list. He also serves as a role model for startup businesses.

While before he became a rich and successful business man, Ma was not so popular and grateful. It isn’t difficult to find Ma is not handsome at all, in some point of view he has a special appearance. And he experienced many obstacles. As Ma himself stated that he took four years to pass the Chinese entrance exams, he got rejected by Harvard Business School ten times, and he was even the only one job applicant who was rejected by KFC when there was twenty-four people went for job.

In my opinion, Jack Ma is a typical man who gain achievement and admiration by successful in his work. Now I believe people would hardly reject Jack Ma as a powerful billionaire. Just as Kilmartin intro to men studies said “men gain status by being successful in all that they do, especially in sports, work, and sexual ‘ conquest.’ Powerful men earn the respect and admiration of others.”

Bibliography

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Ma

In the documentary, the boy who are different, actually are gentler and softer than boys around him, are bullied at school really jumped out at me. Because I am a mom of two boys, while I was watching the aspect I doubted whether my boys would be bullied some day for my education which were to lead them to become a gentle and nice man. I begin to think about not only the education to my boys but also the major education to boys in my city. As well as school bully, the rate of drink, smoke, playing PC games, et. caught my attention too. It make me consider how to guide my boys gain interesting and healthy life, how to help them gradually grow strong enough to tell right from wrong.

In Carlos Andres Gomez book, the author said “he (his dad) is one of the most cultured and open people I have met. And yet he is still a human being. Aren’t we all? He’ll quietly encourage and enforce all of these masculine norms but still tell me to love and appreciate everyone.” which also got my attention. Carlos didn’t hate but understand his dad although his dad incorrectly educated him in some point of view. Compared with the documentary, one of the psychologist and educator, at the end of the documentary, expressed his forgiveness and pity for his father. Both Carlos and the psychologist and educator eventually understand there is no perfect dad or parents, there are only human beings who all grow up in the mask which may lead them to make mistakes unconsciously. These two aspects really make me relax a lot.

My father was a real man, and he was the man who inspires me all though my life. 

My father was tall, handsome and good natured. He had a good reputation for his good temper and could get along with our relatives and neighbours. He often tried his best to help our relatives and neighbours when they need help. He told me that people were living in a group, where people could gain more power and achieved better life, and members in the group should support each other. Now I am a helpful and happy person with many good friends and harmonious relationship, and I think this is own to my father.

My father was a good husband and father. In the environment where my parents lived, a husband often had more advantage and power in a family; however, my father respected my mother and was willing to put her in the most important position in our family. On the other hand, my mother refused to accept any other man and have been singled for 20 years since my father passed away. She says she is not alone.

My father was extremely brave and strong even if he was facing the death. When doctor told my parents my father got a career and had only one year to live, my mother burst into sorrow and despair; however, my father never showed any sadness before my mother. He always comforted my mother with the thought that he didn’t feel any pain and malaise, maybe he would live for a long time. On the other hand, he tried his best to earn and save more money for my family. He told me that he didn’t fear going to heaven where everyone would go, but he did worry about the life of our family without his support.

My father is my hero. He inspired me to face and overcome the difficulties in my life with his sense of responsibility, his optimism and his courage, and I will inherit these good qualifies to inspire my children.