From my personal experience, Highschool is survival of the fittest. As boys hit puberty there testosterone, as well as there, drive to show dominance over there peers skyrockets. In schools, “The fear of being seen as a sissy dominates the cultural definitions of manhood” ( Kimmel 147), and what is the best way to prove you’re not a sissy? Well, for teenage boys the answer is simple, sexual harassment or physical violence.

As most boys start to have there first real interest in women, more often then not there urge for domination or pride leads them to sexual assault or harassment. “26 per cent of girls say they experienced unwanted sexual contact at school” (McGuire 2019). Bullying, one of the main factors contributing to violence inside schools can also lead to sexual assault towards the opposite sex. Men, especially younger ones have this need to fit into the “Man Box” (defined by)(Kilmartin 6) which causes them to be more aggressive towards anyone who dares challenge there ability or requirements to be considered a “man” in the eyes of there surrounding peers which can even go as far as men forcing themselves onto the opposite sex to assert dominance or to gain some sort of “manly” requirement. Men also tend to have buildups of emotions because relationships between men “focus on doing things together and tend to be emotionally shallow.” (Kilmartin 161) stopping men from emotionally expressing themselves among each other.

Bullying between one man to another is the most common and this is because of the need to be masculine. “Masculinity refers most commonly to socially constructed expectations of appropriate behaviors, beliefs, expressions, and styles of social interaction for men in a culture or subculture at a given time.” (Kimmel 5) and sadly, the “appropriate” behavior between men would be to show everyone how much more of a man you are compared to your peers through physical violence. “41 percent of boys say they were physically assaulted at high school” (McGuire 2019) but why is this? It’s because being “different” is seen as a threat between schoolboys.

Being “different” can mean anything along the lines of having different colored hair or being less muscular or liking “feminine” things compared to your fellow brotherhood and These “different” schoolkids are the prime target for bullying and physical violence because they “challenge” the norms of other more “manly” males. “If all the other guys like playing with dolls and I don’t am I the none-manly one?”. Thoughts like these create even more of a need to show dominance through the form of bullying.

This information and knowledge of violence in schools combined with the knowledge we have collected and explored regarding masculinity creates a lot of insight into this topic. Men act the way they act in schools to prove they’re worth to each other. “I’m the strongest so I’m the manliest and because I bully the rest of you you’re less of a man for letting me beat you up”. Thoughts like these are the problem with violence in schools. As a teenager, you’ll do anything you can to fit in and that’s including physical violence.

References;

https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/school-violence-editors-note-1.5331402

“Masculinity as Homophobia” by: MICHAEL S. KIMMEL

“Masculinity” by: MICHEAL S. KIMMEL

“No man is an island, Men n Relationships” by: KILLMARTIN

“Defining Men’s Studies” by: KILLMARTIN

During both presentations, I attended during international women’s week I learned a lot. During the first presentation, I learned a lot about climate change and how it’s affecting the indigenous peoples of our land but especially how it is affecting the indigenous women. Indigenous lands are being exploited for resources by those who have no right to do so. Indigenous communities are fighting to protect there land as well as each other. These types of situations are leading to poverty and other terrible outcomes for the indigenous peoples however it is especially affecting women due to there low socio-economic power.

During the second lecture, I learned a lot about the terrible bill 21 and how it is affecting the female Muslim community. One of the presenters shared there story of being a Muslim teacher who wears a hijab and the constant threat of bill 21 threatening her every move. She talked about how it was her choice to wear a hijab and it’s not because she’s” stupid” its just her choice. We also covered how just because she wears a hijab she is professionally stuck and is unable to receive any sort of promotions because of her hijab.

Both of these lectures relate to what we’ve covered in class especially Kimmel’s view of gender as an institution. Kimmel talks about how we expect certain genders to bring certain attributes of there gender into otherwise gender-neutral institutions which I believe to be especially true in the case of female Muslim teachers. It is not fair to assume that a female who happens to be Muslim is teaching our kids that they will teach our kids Muslim values and be biased towards people of there own culture. Another theory that relates to International women’s week would be Kimmel’s idea of “Doing Gender”. Kimmel states that gender is less of a component of our identity and more of a product of our interactions. Inequality is taught. In the case of indigenous women, it is a consequence of how people of non-indigenous backgrounds view them

For this blog post, I decided to interview my best friend and twin brother Ryan about our relationship as best friends. Here’s how it went.

1.  Why are you close to your friend? Be specific.

Going into this question I already knew what to expect as the answer because its quite obvious but he responded with something along the lines of “you’re my twin I have no choice but to be close with you” which makes sense however when I asked him to go into more details it was hard for him. I tried to ask him some follow-ups such as “If we weren’t brothers would we still be friends” and more questions like that however he didn’t seem comfortable answering anything and when he did he would just joke around responding with answers such as “you’ll never know I guess” etc…

2. What kinds of things do you like to do together?

In my opinion, this question went best because we do almost everything together. He responded exactly how I would have to say things such as “we play video games together, we play sports together, we laugh together” etc… However, one answer that caught my attention was “We fight together” which is true. When I asked him to go further into detail he said ” There is no one in this world that can piss me off more then you do” and as mean as it sounds to say but I understood exactly where he was coming from. Ryan and I spend so much time together we can annoy the hell out of each other but we always get past it rather quickly. I knew deep down there was also no one that made him laugh as much as I did but no way he was saying that out loud.

3. Have you ever told your friend how much he means to you? If so, what did you say and how did he react? If you have never told him how much he means to you, why not?

His response was “I never tell you because it’s self-explanatory” which I think I agree with. Ryan and I just have an unspeakable bond that’s greater than just being twin brothers. Were best friends and we kinda just know that no matter what we come first in each other’s lives. There’s no need to say it out loud.

On page 3 of “Masculinity” by Michael Kimmel, he explains and expresses that “Institutions accomplish the creation of gender difference and the reproduction of gender order through several gendered processes” (Kimmel 3). This is the idea that institutions (and their employers) such as schools or the workplace have automatic biases and expectations based on someone’s gender such as how men are better doctors because they don’t have to worry about pregnancy and can devote more time to there medical studies compared to the female doctors (Kimmel 3). These biases and assumptions towards the different genders go on to create inequality between them by separating and comparing them to each other. In the 4th episode of “Man Enough” one of the girls who came forth to share their story with us was a girl who had been employed at a wall street bank trying to make a career for herself but ended up quitting after her boss kept pushing the idea of engaging in a relationship with him would be “in her best interest” if she truly wanted a career at that workplace which I think from Kummels point of view only happened in the first place because of these gender imbalances in most institutions.

Kimmel writes on page 4 that “Understanding how we do masculinities… opens up the unimaginable possibilities for social change” (Kimmel 4). What Kimmel means by “masculinities” and why he pluralizes it is because of how many different views there are of what it means to be masculine all across the globe. I believe this was Kimmel’s attempt to open the doors of masculinity and show that no matter what kind of man you are you should be accepted. The men talking in the fourth episode of “Man Enough” demonstrated and showed us all how just by having a deep conversation about feelings and emotions with each other which the “ideal man” shouldn’t typically do opened up so many different possibilities and understandings for all of them as well as the comfort in knowing they aren’t alone.

If there’s one man in my life who inspires me above all others it would have to be my dad. At the young age of 16, my father started his own company cutting grass. He already had a couple of employees and lawnmowers and was already making more than most of his teachers in high school which is why he decided to drop out of high school at the age of 17. My father flew to Belgium a year later and met my mom who he would marry and have his first kid with at the age of 20. By this time my dad’s company was doing better than ever. He employed my grandfather and my mom and was shaping his company into becoming more of a landscaping company and less of a lawn mowing company. My dad started with nothing but a lawnmower and a few of his buddies and quickly with no help from anyone or anything but his ambitions built a company. Over time my father grew his company into a source of income for hundreds of families including his 4kids who he sacrifices everything for. My father is the ultimate role model in my opinion because he started from the ground up, proved everyone wrong who said he wouldn’t make it without a high school degree and showed me how to see past people doubting me.

My favourite food is pizza.