Not all of people can tell you interesting stories about their schools how much they enjoyed it who their first best friend name was or  talk about their first childish love.Instead they have terrible memories they avoid to talk about so they forget many bad memorize that happened to them.
There are many different reasons that causes people to have bad experiences in school, but of course bullying is the biggest cause of psychological, emotional and physical pain.
From the documentary (the mask you live in) they showed us how 1 in 4 boys reports being bullied at school and how only 30% of those who are bullied notify adults.
I once discussed  about this issue with my friend I asked him:in your opinion  what is the reason that makes boys violent at a certain young age. He said to me: When I was young I translated love with violence. If one of my friends did something I felt it was wrong I would beat him because in my subconscious mind its okay to do that my parents loves me so much and they do that when I do something wrong.
In this semester we have learned about the nature of men and how they construct their personality to be stronger, stubborn, and angry, in order to suit the requirements for the ideal man based on society needs.
And the school itself is a small society and in it boys begin to learn more about what is required of them to become men and from here the pressure begins for them.From a young age,boys have learned that they cannot cry and cannot reveal their feelings scared of the fact that other kids will bully them for being soft and sensitive ,so The only way to remove these dark and negative feelings is by violence and anger.we saw from the documentary (the mask you live in) how Ashanti Branch did an activity with his student were they take a mask and they write in front of it what represent them what they let people see and in the back he told them to write  what they don’t let people see.most students wrote in front happy, fun, power ,goofy ,and back side were love, sadness, anger, fear.They are scared of showing their emotions because they will show weakness and this is will lead them to being not men enough or not being real men.
All  of the reasons I talked about above showed how boys didn’t  knew the right way to translate their feelings and express their pain and how does the word real man start its stress from a small age for a man.
In conclusion, what should happen is teachers or people who are authorized in behaving the boys should focus more about what causing the problem rather than the problem itself, they need to spend more time talking to the bully try to let them talk to know what is happening inside their mind that causing all this negative reflections.Because in the end there is no bad person. All people have their circumstances and experiences that forced them to make a mistake. And of course having  people who can be listen and help them will successfully transform the lives of many young men.

I don’t see myself as a political person and I don’t like to get myself involved in any political arguments ,but surprisingly I found myself very interested in the topics that Lucy and Jen discussed during the presentation of climate change, pipelines, and violence against women.
It caught my attention when they talked about how Indigenous women and girls are representing16% of all female homicides in Canada, while constituting only 4% of the female population in Canada,and how 80% of people displaced by climate change are women.knowing that women are excluded from making decisions about climate change although they are the highest percentage of people who are affected by climate change.
Throughout this course we learned a lot of men stereotypes who take advantage of the power they have to achieve their plans and uses their power over the people who doesn’t have any power or who are ignored by the government or society.after this presentation I learned a lot about topics that never interested me, and I know now that even one voice could make a difference.

There’s a very meaningful sentence I learned in my life it’s which is you always have to listen to both side of a story.Before the presentation of living in the shadow of law 21.I agreed with bill 21 because I thought it is better for us to deal with people without knowing their religions and it was better to resolve decisions away from racial discrimination in order to fight sectarianism.Nadia and Laity spoke about a lot of problems and obstacles that faced them because of racist people, and how they were dealing with difficulties only because of their religion, nationality or color.after hearing Nadia’s story, how bill 21 affected her life,work,and future, to develop in a career she chose and loved made me change my mind about agreeing to this law.In my opinion, there are many people who don’t reveal their beliefs or religion to public but at the same time they are racist to people from other religions.In conclusion we cannot fight racism with a law that affects specific people more than others and is preventing them from performing their religions duties and beliefs.

For this blog i interviewed one of my best friends his name is Hussien.

When I asked him the first question, Why are you close to your friend?He answered:because I knew him from along time ,he is loyal he understand me the most ,we have a lot in common, he help me solve my problems.His answers were the same as the Relationship basics that Christopher Kilmartin and Andrew P. Smiler. Talked about in “no man is an island”.

When I asked him about the things do you like to do ?He told me: going out stand up for each other play video games , go car rides ,drink go to parties.I saw it’s really similar to the things that the writers referred to the United States men in their relationships.

About the third question his answer was:No,I never told him what he means to me,Because its not necessary to tell him about my feelings basically my actions towords him explains to him how much he means to me.

As refereed in “No man is an island “Men usually prefer to speak their feelings with actions rather than words.

Micheal Kimmel gave a lot of exampels for his readers to prove his point on how institutions are themselves gendered.He talked about the workplaces, the field of medicine, any typical academic career a scholar completes a PhD.he explained the problem when he said ‘’ genderless people are assumed to be able to devote themselves single-mindedly to their jobs, to have no children or family responsibility, and perhaps even to have familial supports for such single-minded workplace devotion.Thus,the ‘’genderless’’job holder turns out to be gendered as a man. In the fourth episode of man enough Karen Alston talked about what happened to her at her first job how her boss one night told her he wanted to date her and he told her what was the perks of dating him how he will give her perfect marks, days off and he will let her buy clothes and shoes and suits.i could really see how a lot of man thinks that women can’t get their job done without them.

Kimmel uses the term of masculinities Because it recognizes the dramatic variation in how different groups define masculinity even in the same society at the same time.Kimmel talked about how doing gender is a lifelong process of performances and how is gender an emergent property of interactions coerced from us by others. At the end of the documentry They explained why they are doing the documentary how they are helping to learn more about respecting women also to give the tools that they learned to the next generation so they don’t have to make the same mistakes they did.

there is a sentence  that always occurs to my mind whenever I hear or see a person doing a bad thing to another person or to himself , and that is there is no smoke without fire.

when I think of how Abused and neglected children are 9 times more likely to be involved in crime ,I wasn’t surprised that much when I knew that 1 in 6 boys is sexually abused.Or how is 90%of homicide perpetrators are male and over half of all boys are physically abused .I  started to connect all the dots,if they can’t cry,can’t express there feelings nor show their weakness to others and at the same time they have a lot of pressure to become this ideal version of a man in this society ,they will eventually have to let all these bad feelings go in some sort of a way,so they tend to be aggressive they use curse words they scream they fight they bully they might even kill themselves or others.

All these prisoners that where in the documentary they witnessed abuse in so many awful ways it  gave me chills and so much emotions just by hearing there stories and knowing how they ended up there.

The truth is,only when we move away from what we’ve subconsciously learned can we ever truly find and know who we are.

Carlos words basically shows the struggle of everything he had taught about masculinity and what pressure has society put over him,and how much he was tired of hiding his emotions and sensitivity and  how tired he was of being stigmatized for wanting to communicate and express himself.The documentry helped me understand his struggles by showing me how man are forced to bury all their emotions and fears because they will get bullied on .How they always have to be strong tough powerful to create this ideal man to satisfy the society.and unfortunately how bad it’s affecting them and the world. 

Carine Saiori 

When I think of people who inspires me they need to have certain things in there character to motivate me to grow myself into a better version of me.I have different idols for every part of my future self.when it comes to men who inspires me they must have the top men standards to help shine the little man inside me and there’s no one who can do it better than Harvey Specter he is a character in my favourite series “suits”.He is confident loves challenges ,cocky knows how to manipulate people to get where he wants,he’s a smart man who knows what he wants, he’s the best in his field ,and he’s intelligent he can win all conversations .I’m really aiming to build this part of my personality where mixing between the man and women inside me to help creat the best version of me.

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Carine Saiori 

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