Violence in schools is something that everyone is aware of but not something many people talk about. It is often covered up by school boards to prevent a “bad reputation” for the school in which it occurs. Boys are more likely to perform acts of violence as well as be targeted by them. 41% of boys have been physically assaulted in high school (Mcguire 2019) and this is not a coincidence. Many factors contribute to the fact that boys are much more involved in school violence than their female peers.
In North American society, boys learn to fit into stereotypes of masculinity based on the male figures around them. They follow “rules” of which characteristics they should have such as strength, independence, and hard work ethic (Kilmartin 2). This is necessary for them to feel accepted by their peers. Boys feel lots of pressure to fit into these characteristics and the pressure can lead them to act violently either due to repressed anger from not expressing their emotions in a healthy manner, or they can be the targets of violent acts if they do not fit into the boxes set up for them by society. Boy’s relationships with their friends promote emotionlessness and their feelings are often displayed through violence and insults (Kilmartin 169). These social norms carry on in life and men are likely to act with violence and lack of emotion regardless of who they are with.
The concept of masculinity in our society depends greatly on homophobia. Homophobia is not about the fear of gay men, but rather a man’s fear that another man will emasculate him (Kimmel 147). Throwing around homophobic slurs and acting as if you are tougher than everyone else is a part of boys need to be seen as masculine. With this comes bullying and the hierarchy of teenage boys showing off their toughness. Boys bully those who they do not deem to be manly. They exclude girls, homosexuals, people of other cultures with different definitions of manliness, and anyone who does not exude masculinity at all times (Kimmel 150). They will avoid waring clothes that look too “girly”, walking in a way that looks too “gay”, and avoid talking about how they feel completely so they are not seen as a feminine person. Sometimes this exclusion turns into violent hateful acts towards these people, all because of what boys think it is to be “a real man”.
There are not only acts of physical violence in high schools, but acts of sexual assault as well. Kimmel has stated that “What it means to be a man is to be unlike a woman” (2). Men distance themselves so much from their femininity, that they start to belive women to be lesser than them. This sometimes evolves into boys bullying girls, men oppressing women, and overall the idea that men are stronger and smarter and better than women just because of the characteristics they display. Men will often explicitly show interest in women to prove to others that they aren’t gay (Kimmel 148), and sometimes they take this a step farther. To prove that they are powerful and can get what they want, while proving that they are interested in women, some men will force women to participate in sexual activities without her consent. While most cases in schools are of sexual harassment such as catcalling and asking for or sending nude pictures, there are far too many cases of sexual assault. 26% of girls have said they experienced unwanted sexual contact while in school (Mcguire 2019). If boys were brought up knowing that they can express their feminine side and that femininity is not something to be ashamed of, there would be far less unfortunate cases happening in high schools.
Saying “boys will be boys” is not enough to repair the men entering society with twisted beliefs and poor mental health. The things they learn about masculinity and how to be a “real man”, harm not just themselves, but their peers, friends, and family. Teaching boys ways in which to healthily express their emotions could tremendously decrease the amount of violence present in our schools as well as in society in general.
Works Cited:
Kilmartin. “Defining Men’s Studies.”
Kilmartin. “No Man is an Island: Men in Relationships”
Kimmel. “Masculinity”
Kimmel, Michael S. “Masculinity as Homophobia.” 1994, pp. 147–151., doi:10.4135/9781452243627.n7.
Mcguire, Jennifer. “Why CBC Started Looking into Violence in Schools.” CBC, 2019, http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/school-violence-editors-note-1.5331402.
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